10 Inexplicable Pictures of Gary Busey.

Gary Busey is surely one of the most important and dignified actors of our time. And by that I mean, “Gary Busey has never been photographed in a normal fashion.” Some people don’t know how to look when a picture is taken. Unfortunately, Gary Busey knows exactly how he wants to look when a picture is taken. Don’t understand? You will after the jump.

This picture is at least mildly understandable. I sometimes make a face similar to this when pictures are taken of me. Perhaps Gary Busey is like some of us: uncomfortable with photos taken of him.

Oh lord the teeth. Okay, so definitely. I see why he made the other face earlier. Go look at your teeth in a mirror. I’ll wait. Now, aren’t Gary Busey’s teeth at least twice as long as yours? Because they are certainly larger than mine. That can’t be natural.

First of all, this man almost certainly has surgically enhanced front teeth. That’s what draws the attention in this photograph. But look at the background…why are there firemen in the background? What is going on here? And why did Gary Busey stop in the middle of it to take a picture?

…what is this. When did this happen. Why is it happening. Who allowed it to happen. Most worrying of all, the monkey appears to be an astronaut of some kind, and yet the best he can do is Gary Busey? An astronaut monkey could be making out with someone higher on the “insane actors” ladder. Maybe Mel Gibson?

Here we have a picture of the rare “Sad Busey”, deviating sharply from his cousins “Happy Busey” and “Scary Busey”. Also, I can’t find on the internet whether or not he has a lazy eye. In some pictures it seems like he must, but others look completely normal. Someone figure this out.

And here’s Scary Busey. I just cannot understand what would possess him to make this face. It’s quite simply not an expression that should be attributed to anything humanoid in nature. It’s like a chestburster alien is making it’s way out of him. The more I look at his eyes, the more this picture feels like he is about to begin weeping.

I love this picture because it is exactly the same as the last one. It’s clearly the same event he is at, but a different person taking a different picture, and yet his brain again goes “Alright, another camera. Let’s get the ‘man impaled by rusty javelin’ face out again”.

I think maybe Gary Busey’s father was killed by a cameraman, and this is what causes these reactions to a simple camera. He sees one, and the memories of his father’s death just rush back into his mind. His head twitches to the right, as seen above, and then he goes into the screaming mode. “HELLO. MY NAME IS GARY BUSEY. YOU KILLED MY FATHER. PREPARE TO DIE.” The cameramen, having been briefed for this occasion, remain calm and say nothing. Busey’s face snaps back to normal, and he resumes his speech.

The only word I can think of to describe this picture is “cackling”. I really want to know what he’s done here that made him so proud of himself. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s finally taken a picture at whatever event this and the two terrifying earlier pictures were at without screaming. Maybe.

YOU CANNOT ESCAPE.