2011 Oscars Liveblog: Toy Story 3 vs. the World

27 02 2011

Franco only loves his anime pillow pal

So apparently tonight is the Oscars, and for whatever reason I see fit, I guess I will liveblog the damn thing. After watching two best picture nominees yesterday (Winter’s Bone and The King’s Speech), all I’ve able to think about is the Christopher Guest movie For Your Consideration (great movie, by the way). Why? Because so many Oscar films just have this air of snottiness and self-importance that just makes me sick sometimes. It just feels like people will only make movies to try to rake in awards based on merits such as “dysfunction, crying, over-the-top emotions” and so on. Maybe I just hate seeing other people succeed, but then again, Transformers 2 is one of the highest grossing movies of all time, so I guess it’s not just the awards show films. The point is, I see movies as something to entertain first, and then inspire second, and not the other way around. I’d be totally fine if a movie about Gandhi fudged things and made him a bodybuilder with a Gatling gun.

Anyways, here are the Best Picture films I have seen: Toy Story 3, Winter’s Bone, Inception, The King’s Speech, and True Grit. Here’s how I’d rank them and why…

5. Winter’s Bone: The intrigue of the story kept me interested for the majority of the movie, but damn, the ending was about as uneventful and unexciting as one could possibly expect. Weeee, they all do meth! Weeee, they’re ignorant hicks with anger issues! Weeeee, the lead lady is stuck in a horrible life at the beginning of the film and the end of it too! Jennifer Lawrence did a fine acting job, but if this wins Best Picture, I’m not going to be pleased.

4. Inception: Everyone wants to talk about “how overrated” Inception is, simply because of all the hype that came with Chris Nolan and the fact that it was a high-grossing summer movie. That said, it still had an interesting story and some really cool visuals that made me enjoy it overall. Let’s be honest here: not many people outside of Nolan could make something like dream inception seem plausible. This shouldn’t win BP, but that doesn’t mean it was a bad movie. Also, let’s not forget a certain blue alien film that was nominated for Best Picture last year…..

3. Toy Story 3: It is near impossible to not like this movie, but it’s in the minority simply because it’s a kid’s film. I would totally get behind this winning Best Picture though.

2. The King’s Speech: The two lead actors stole the show on this one, and made this movie go from 2 stars to 3.5 stars for me. Geoffry Rush was simply fantastic as the speech therapist; if he doesn’t win Best Supporting Actor, I will never look at this already “whatever” award again.

1. True Grit: That’s right, I’m a Coen Bros. homer, so sue me. Even with this movie, a movie that breaks a lot of artsy guy code (it’s a remake of an adaptation of a book, for one thing), but True Grit was the best Oscar movie I saw all year (my favorite movie overall of last year is still Kick Ass). The presentation, the acting (everybody was great in their respective roles), the feel; it felt like I was living in a snarky, slightly humorous Western world. This movie won’t win Best Picture, but it deserves to get at least Best Actor, and I’d root for Best Actress too.

And yes, I know my opinions are skewed since I didn’t see the likes of the other five movies, although you won’t get me to ever see The Kids Are Alright.

Anyways, catch up with me after the jump when the awards show starts. There’ll plenty of making fun of snooty celebrities after the jump, when the Oscars actually start. See you then!

Liveblog will start when the awards show does. See you then!

7:11: Somehow I got home from dinner before the Oscars started. I’m going to give all credit to the lucky penny I found this morning after church.

7:34: Showtime!

7:36: Franco is gonna steal the f*cking show. Already making this cheesy opening sketch ten times funnier.

7:39: Strong opening sketch. Not as good as that old Jon Stewart one, but still good.

7:41: Wow, this opening monologue is awkwarrrrd. Anne is horrible, this should be all Franco.

7:44: Tom Hanks uses his Oscars as toiletries. This is 100% fact.

7:46: Alice in Wonderland wins the art/set decoration Oscar. What a horrible start. /overreation

7:49: Inception wins Cinematography. Good choice! (that’s code for “I don’t care”)

7:51: Supporting Actress coming up. When did Amy Adams wake up and decide: “I want to get nominated for 3 acting Oscars every year for the rest of my life?”

7:54: Kirk Douglas hitting on Anne Hatheway is about the creepiest thing ever.

7:56: I hope Steinfeld wins. And the winner is…… (you know)……. the chick not named Amy Adams from The Fighter. I’ll take it. She’s hot.

8:03: Timberlake says he’s Banksy. Hahaha! So unfunny!

8:06: I have made a huge mistake in liveblogging this.

8:07: And Toy Story 3 wins best Animated film. I posted this before the award was announced.

8:08: Pixar guys are always so f*cking jovial. It annoys me.

8:08: Wow, this Oscars sucks so far.

8:16: Javier Bardem: best known for chick flicks, unfortunately. He was so damn good in No Country For Old Men. Oh, and Social Network wins best adapted screenplay.

8:19: The King’s Speech wins best screenplay! Good! David Seidler is awesome!

8:26: Oh no! Songs!

8:34: I’m done. This is f*cking boring. I’ll watch, but this isn’t worth liveblogging. Night all.



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